Even those who never had any children told you that: “Good luck with adolescence!”. At the time, you were still a long way from this stage (a fatal one for your nerves…) You smiled, so sure your kid would save you from the worst: the famous “adolescence crisis”! But the train has caught up with you! And now you are right in the middle of this crazy phasis! You feel as your kid no longer recognizes you and treats you less well than a stranger… Do you have a teenager -in-the-making at home? Let me tell you about these six behaviors that will drive you totally crazy!
He needs to get a label stuck to him! It doesn’t matter which one it is. It seems to me that being goth, punk, emo or whatever is not the worst thing…
The Teenager Answers Using Grunts
By becoming a teenager your child forgets his rhetoric basics! At a certain stage when you ask him questions he grunts to answer. “Rhaaah!!”. It’s up to you to guess if that means yes or no… It seems to me that the stage of growling instead of “responding” with real words affects boys more than girls who are calmer in their communications. It’s exhausting to hear onomatopoeia, sighs and grunts every time you ask a teenager something. It’s quite tiring to repeat the same things ten times and never get a clear and precise answer. If I want a constructive dialogue I must show the pizza waiting on the table and order: “You will eat when you will answer my question clearly, with real words, real sentences and real concepts!” It may seem funny but day after day it may become very annoying…
Your Teenager Seems Deaf!
Another very annoying fact: he doesn’t seem to hear you when you even call him for meals. He systematically closes all the doors of the room in which he is. It seems like he puts doors and walls between you and him. As he very often has headphones on or plays on his computer (online with his friends), most of the time he does not hear your calls. You spend your time screaming to reach his eardrums. Conclusion you have a permanently broken voice…
Big Little Lies…
He lies! It’s not big lies but… It’s not uncommon for him to lie about his class level when he gets a bad grade at school. He then said: “Yes I got a 2/10 but the rest of the class is worse, they all got a zero!” In short, he always pretends to be better than he is and quiet better than the others. So, you answer “I don’t care about other people’s grades, it’s your grades I’m interested in!” But since the teenager hates being compared, he quickly puts you off… You’re not going forward on this kind of minefield…
He Does Crazy Things Just To See…
Has your child always been reasoned, reasonable and clever? Yes! But now he starts doing crazy things “just to see”, just to test! For mine the best idea he had was to try my tear gas canister in his room while I was away! We came back home and were gripped by a strange smell. The next day we were all at the doctor for a giant angina. But in fact my son ended up admitting that he had sprayed part of the contents of my pepper spray in the house and then aired it out… In winter, an irritated throat catches all the germs… Just imagine the following…
He Needs A Special Label!
He needs to have a label stuck to him. It doesn’t matter which one it is. It seems to me that being goth, punk, emo or whatever is not the worst thing. I was goth between my 16 and my 21 years! It was more of a romantic style that I liked to give myself… My son absolutely wants to be diagnosed with an attention disorder! I took him to the doctor who quickly noticed that by playing on the screens and falling asleep so late it is very difficult to concentrate in class the next day! But no! He doesn’t want to hear that his lack of concentration is a direct result of playing on screens or his late bedtime! For him it is simply impossible! Every time he knows he’s going to get a bad grade, he repeats to me: “You know, I have a big concentration problem! When will I finally be diagnosed?” He forgets his concentration problem the rest of the time… To sum up, if he hasn’t learnt his lessons and gets a bad grade, it’s not his fault! It’s mine since I didn’t manage to have him diagnosed with a concentration disorder!
Ashamed…
The teenager is ashamed of his parents. You are pretty far from stars’families who show off their offspring (always proud of their parents’ career…) For your teenager you are dummies! We don’t work enough, we don’t earn enough, we missed everything so we have to stop advising him on his future! He says exactly what I said to my own father at the same age: “I don’t need your job at the company you work in! I’ll do so much better than that!” (laughs).
These behaviors are exhausting and terrible! The good news is that everything is temporary. Even wars come to an end! A little positive thinking can really help lubricate things. You still have to want to go and buy an oil can at the local garage… Continue to fill your teen’s emotional tank with the right fuel (meaningful words, hugs, gifts, favors or quality time together). The car will eventually drive straight…
